Q+A: Friends but Jealous

Written by: Chereen

Q: I love my best friend, but I’m so jealous of her. She’s got it all going for her from looks to wit and charm. I can’t quite help the way I feel Chereen, sometimes I just wish I was her. I do worry I’m unintentionally jinxing her although she’s a righteous friend. How do I get over it? I just want to be a good friend ?

A: So it seems like you really do look up to this friend, but there’s obvious jealousy that prevents you from being as sincere as you would like to be. I know that you wouldn’t have sent your question if you didn’t genuinely care about her, and that’s incredibly kind of you to do.

I don’t feel it’s necessary to let her know about the way you feel, because that could permanently damage your friendship. However, it might help to take some time away, so you can focus on getting rid of the negative feelings that you harbor. Keep yourself busy with self-improvement. I’m sure there are a lot of things you would like to better within yourself (and maybe even on the outside) so this is your time to do that.

Maybe your friend is the kind of person that is a go-getter and that is admirable. Jealousy can be a disease. So, it’s important you take some space and focus on your heart, mind, and soul. I would also suggest praying to God to help alleviate any jealousy you are experiencing.

If it doesn’t change and you remain jealous, then it might not be healthy to remain best friends. Either that, or you can be acquaintances. See it as your way of looking out for her. She might never fully understand the distance, but it’ll be your gift to her and you’ll know it’s for the better.

You shouldn’t wish to be anyone but yourself, because everyone has flaws they wish they could change. Focus on loving yourself more and appreciating more aspects of yourself. You might find that who you have the potential to become will eliminate the jealousy you feel towards your friend. ❤️