ADVICE: REKINDLING WITH GOD.
I’m Christian but I love your website and instagram. I feel like it speaks to me every single time. Can you tell me now how to get over my depression caused by moving to a new country? I want to reconnect with God but feel so ashamed that I cut myself nightly. Because your thoughts are faith driven I really would value your opinion. Thanks.
Thank you for reaching out to DC. You must have gone through a lot to be in such position. Whatever that you have gone through, you must have been carrying it around with you for quite some time now as it can be quite hard to reach out to the people around you. This however, can take a toll on yourself.
Moving to a new country can be hectic having to organise and adjust yourself to a whole new setting and system. Recognising that you are going through a hurdle caused by moving to a new country is a good step to tackling this. If there are not many people you can connect with, finding places that you can meet new people that are similar to you would be a good idea as it can get quite lonely. Assimilating yourself to a new culture can be quite daunting too. Trick is, treat yourself to favours that remind you of home as you assimilate and accustom yourself to the new culture at your own pace.
I was once at a point when I used to feel ashamed of myself especially in the eyes of God to a point I thought I was unworthy of His sacred home, the mosque. I felt uneasy to be in the mosque and unworthy of the five basic daily prayers. But this particular act moved me even further from God. It’s funny how we deem to see places of worship like a “club for the spiritually pious” but never as a “hospital for the spiritually ill”.
And then I moved to a non-Muslim country.
The most ironic part of it is, I see more of Islam in a secular country than when I was back in my home ground. I was brought up as a Muslim but never fully understand the fundamentals of Islam. My heartbreak, inquisition coupled with the beauty of Islam I found in a non-Muslim country got me closer to God. I eventually learnt and understand more about how Merciful God is and that the more I am suffering, the more He is cleansing me to get nearer to Him.
And then I came across this:
“Allah the Almighty said: I am as My servant thinks I am (1). I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself; and if he makes mention of Me in an assembly, I make mention of him in an assembly better than it. And if he draws near to Me an arm’s length, I draw near to him a cubit, and if he draws near to Me a cubit, I draw near to him a fathom. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed. (1) Another possible rendering of the Arabic is: “I am as My servant expects Me to be”. The meaning is that forgiveness and acceptance of repentance by the Almighty is subject to His servant truly believing that He is forgiving and merciful. However, not to accompany such belief with right action would be to mock the Almighty. It was related by al-Buhkari (also by Muslim, at-Tirmidhi and Ibn-Majah).”
Even if we are of different beliefs, I sincerely pray that this helps you even just a little bit and that you will be lifted of the burden you are going through. <3
Love & Light,