Q+A: Runaway Groom

Written by: Chereen

Q: Hey! I got stood up at my wedding, with a guy I knew for a long time (4 years, would have been a love marriage). His parents didn’t like me because they wanted him to marry someone they chose for him, they made his life hell and it was too much pressure for him. So he decided he didn’t want to get married and he cancelled it last minute. I’m just wondering how someone moves forward from that? Especially since he decided this based on someone else’s desires and not his own.

A: That’s unfair, it’s going to take you time to adjust and heal.

However, I can’t help but think that you were being protected from something bigger and painful. Imagine going into the marriage and the pain that was inflicted on him being transferred to you. He seems to value his parents, and he should, but you never want to be a part of something where the parents passionately dislike you. You deserve to be loved and appreciated. In a way, he was looking out for himself and looking out for you. I’m sure it hurts him a lot too not having you in his life. But the truth is, sometimes life can be painful. There’s wisdom behind the pain and you may understand it later.

The way I see it is that this is meant to help you really know what you want out of your future marriage. Respect, kindness, appreciation, stability, and acceptance- these are just the basics that would contribute to a healthy marriage. I understand it’s very tough, but please take this time to invest in self-care and loving yourself. You deserve that. Allow your friends and family to be your support system. Be patient with your healing. Time will help you get through this if you make it your goal to move forward.

Big hug. ❤️